While on my bike ride this morning, I was thinking about more things to write about. As the sweat started to pour down my face and my legs burned as I pushed myself up another small hill, all I could think was this, "I want to quit." I realized at that exact moment that I think this EVERY day. I love my bike ride in that I get some peaceful alone time, I get some nice fresh air, and I get to do something good for me. I hate that the ride has hills. While the hills are fun to go down, they burn to go up.
So, there it is...I want to quit. I want to quit every day. I fight the temptation to hop off my bike and just walk the rest of the way two or three times a morning. That is me being completely honest. I love it and I hate it all at the same time. So, why not just quit? (Other than the fact that I just started a blog about being a fitness failure hmmmm...) I always tell my students that an F is better than a zero because it is the truth. Hopping off my bike and walking is like failing to turn in an assignment. I don't want to be the fitness zero because that is worse than being a fitness failure.
Last night I took one step toward upping my fitness grade by changing my alarm clock settings. I usually skip my ride on weekends because weekends are a time of relaxation...okay lets be realistic here...I just told you how much I want to quit so why subject myself to that on a Saturday morning? Well, let's see, maybe because I need to push myself and my quitter attitude (this is why I think personal trainers are so effective-it is harder to say no to someone else than it is to say no to yourself). Last night before bed, I clicked my little "alarm mode" button and changed the settings so that my alarm clock goes off seven days a week at 6 am instead of just going off Monday through Friday. This is a step in the right direction especially because I usually consume more calories on weekends and thus need the exercise.
I want to do better and be better I just have to keep going so that my body can discover this good feeling too.